Illustration: What's holding you back?

I always loved to draw. I was pretty good at drawing but never took it to the next level professionally. I wanted to be an artist but when I was growing up, “artist” or “illustrator” was never a viable profession choice. Only recently I had a complete change of heart and realized that I need to do something about my creative ambition.

I keep analyzing what was holding me back in my creative journey and came to the conclusion that illustration was never my priority Number One. Well, I always thought I am meant to be an artist, but I always was good at drawing so I took it for granted. I never had to learn to be good at drawing, so I never appreciated my skill and thought this talent will always be with me. And I will have plenty of time to get to it and do something with it. So I was pursuing other things (a career in design, to name one.)

Then I had a thought — what if one day I wake up and I suddenly don’t have it anymore? Don’t have the skill that comes so easily to me now? This weird thought got me a little more motivated. I really did not want to face God and explain to Her why I threw away my talents.

That’s when I started painting with watercolors. I used to do acrylic and oil painting (and that is what launched my creative career, by the way, but that is the story for another time), but it’s not easy to use that kind of messy/smelly medium in a small space. That was time for experiments. I took a workshop on how to create paint from nature (stones, in that case), along with a workshop on creating pottery from natural clay (found on river banks or stream beds). I also painted with wine and coffee (using them as medium, not sipping while I paint). I watched some online classes and copied a lot of other artists’ work. (that’s how they used to do it in the old times!) That took me a while, but I did come to the realization that I want to share my work with the world.

The funny thing was this next step — watercolors — was still holding me back. I really tried to improve but I couldn’t devote as many hours to painting as I wanted to, so the progress was super slow. I started with what was hard for me, and it was not helping me to move forward!

It’s important to always analyze whether or not what you are doing is bringing you closer to your goals or holding you back. If you are not moving forward… well, it means you need to make some changes.

There are few things I’ve started doing, but these were the first two steps that helped me to get started with my artists journey:

  1. Gouache. Gouache (unlike watercolor) allowed me to become fully absorbed in the process and I absolutely loved the end result of my paintings. Gouache was easier for me than watercolor and not as messy as acrylic. Don’t start with what’s hard for you! Start with small, easy steps.

  2. Forgave myself for not making enough time for my art. Yes, I was beating myself up for not being able to paint for 3-4 hours daily. As soon as I realized that not everyone have the same 24 hours a day (opposite of what they tell us, huh), I let go of that massive weight of guilt and that freed up energy! So right there I got some extra energy, that allowed be to be more efficient with that one hour a day I could devote to painting.

So it’s pretty easy first two steps, right? Read my previous post on how to start painting, I go into more details on the steps that I took to start painting more.

Share your thoughts below, what do you think is holding you back?